It doesn’t seem right that after a long hiatus of writing this tinny blog, I return to the keyboard in the midst of a god damn global pandemic.
Can you not hear Papatūānuku trying to breathe!
So once again, I am facing a situation, like millions of others, not one I have chosen, although if you follow the idea that we choose our human meatsacks in the greater collective consciousness before conception, then ok! What lessons am I to be learning now? Why am I not listening to my direction, how many times do I need to get side swiped before I listen to my contract with human existence I made pre birth?
Are you lost yet? I am. Terribly.
I am finding it awfully easy to stack the shit times I have experienced of late on top of each other like a Jenga game played in Quakecity. It’s difficult to continue on a path that is so vividly and morbidly scattered with shit. There is only so many times one can pick up a turd and push it to the side. Ive acknowledged and dealt with a fair share of pakaru I would have thought. But no, apparently I am not done. And although this situation is not special to me, it is special to me and my journey.
I have spent today listening to Aaron of Kong chatting accountability. Its calming and cheerful and raises many questions I found myself asking. But most importantly for me, it has gently nudged me to record the things I am grateful for. For the things I do have control of.
I have the freedom and authority to choose how I react, adjust or respond to this situation. I can choose how I behave and how I treat others.
I always preach (everyone loves a preacher) ‘Fake it, until you become it.” Andros thinks it’s a coping mechanism, which I guess it is, but it also bloody works. I will fake being ok with this crisis, until I am ok with it.
I believe with all my heart that I am here in this lifetime to share a love of creating with people. It’s my jam. My fire has not burned out yet, its just sheltering from the storm for a bit.
I hope to see you all on the other side x
Peace Out x Arohanui x